Monday, February 28, 2011


Why are my parents so good at finding good new music while i'm the one stuck in previous generations, ones I didn't even take part in? It has been an awful long time since i've sat down and listened to something other than the beatles. I almost missed it. but not really.

As i ran upstairs to grab my ipod and book, my dad was snagging the new free songs from itunes and he asked me if i'd heard Two Door Cinema Club. No, I hadn't.

So i chatted with Dad a minute and listened to them. Not bad. Actually pretty darn good. They're Irish and, honestly, foreign bands are almost always the best.
I particularly liked this song (it's the first one i heard, coincidentally...)
(also, i would've embedded it since i know how now, but twas taking fortnights uploading. so you get a link instead. please still click it though, it's worth it.

They're different and fun and good and dancey. yeah. dancey.
and everything we hear from mainstream America is blah. Basically puke with a thumping base-line and repetative lyrics. It's so refreshing, hearing new music that doesn't sound like totally shallow songs about love and breaking up and blah.

So now i like Two Door Cinema Club. And, i've gotta be honest, as soon as my TDCC playlist ran out, i went back to my trusty Beatles. I'll listen to it again tomorrow, i'm sure, I just really wanted to listen to Ringo sing Boys again. oh, baby :) hah. It keeps going from George to Ringo. ugh... but awesome. I'll be sure to take a pic and post it of my drawing of George with paisley hairs once it's finito.

also. hooooozah for no school tomorrow cept juniors. although i would've appreciated the free ACT last year... jerk school board. AND stinkin math teacher making me come in and turn in homework and pick up new assignment. uurgh. argh. barge.

Saturday, February 26, 2011

New Found Puke

hah. not really puke. It's funny, insightful, and it makes me want to write novels even though i'm more of a short-story type.

It's called throwing up words.

It's a bunch of writers blogging about writing and some guest posts about writing and it's so great!

My YW leader Sandy's sister is Ann Dee on the throwing up words. i've read her book This is what I did and it was amazing. It's about an 8th grader, Logan, and how he witnessed a violent situation between his friend Zyler and Zyler's dad and how he dealt with it along with Logan's blooming friendship with Laurel (a palindrome collector). It's so good, but there are some questionable bits but i would reccommend it all the way. SO good.

I really want to read Everything is Fine but i don't have it. I need to take a trip to the library anyway... haha.

Nothing much else happening... I applied to In-N-Out today. I sure hope i get that job!

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

I think i'm Ready.

For graduation.
For college.
For moving out.
For meeting new people.
For fending for myself.

I can do this.
Remember like 2 months ago? Or maybe it was last month... anyway... How I really did not want to move out? How incredibly nervous I was for graduating and growing up and doing things on my own?
Those baby-steps have turned into sprinter's leaps (if that's a thing?...) so fast that I'm almost incapable of comprehending it. I jumped from fearful to anxious in a matter of minutes, it seems. Did I really have to talk myself into thinking I am capable of handling myself on my own? Looking back, probably not. I can do laundry and cook and I keep my spaces more clean than some people I know and I don't bother a whole lot and I'm not a jerk and I'm sure my 20-some year old roomates won't find me a noob who can't find her way without mommy. My mother taught me well and I am truly grateful.
Does this post mean I got a job? no. Still no. I've gained confidence, not responsibility, sorry to say. "You're not responsible enough for your future." I'll get there. One baby-step-sprinter's-leap at a time.
As I plugged in my earbuds to listen to my Beatles playlist (124 songs) and write my essay for English, I could hear mom reassuring sister that soon she can yell all she wants and do whatever (basically, i was trying not to pay too much attention so as to not let myself cry). But does she realize she'll have to do 100% of the chores? Not the half that she does now, but the whole shibang. And there will be no Ellen to just do nice things like I try to do (i.e. organizing her bathroom because it drives me insane, doing her half of the dishwasher just out of the kindness of my heart, taking her and her friends places, listening to her vent). She'll have to fend for herself almost as much as I will. Except financially. And as great as she is at making money, I am probably better at saving it and/or spending it wisely.

In all honesty, hate thinking about it because it does weird things to me and my tearducts, but i think i'm ready to do this. Whatever "this" may be.

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Hi, I'm Ellen...

and i'm an addict.
of the beatles.
SHOOT! OH, i just love them all the time. I don't think i've actually intentionally changed my ipod playlist from my Beatles playlist (with 124 songs on it currently, soon to have like 200 more... yes. there are duplicates. but i love them all the same.)
It pains me how much I love them. I get heart-break every time i realize that half of them are dead and the other half aren't as cool as they used to be without the other half. dang. at least they're immortalized legends. basically.
and stupid posers with their tee-shirts. I don't even own a beatles tee and I probably love them 10 times more. probably. ugh.... i love them.
Having no swag reminds me that I have hardly any of my obsessionated loves (or whatever... just go with it...) products. I had a beatles shirt once... then it got holey and old and small...
I have a vampire weekend tee... but i share that with abby sometimes.
I have 3 buttons based on Abby's obsession (Happy Days)... but no beatles.
or Miami Vice. I watched about 2 episodes of Miami Vice a day over the summer. I had to stop at the 4th season though because i couldn't stand Crockett's hair...
I even named my uke after Crockett.
But no swag.
I really resented Abby getting Happy Days tee shirts and buttons and conversations with people "oh, you like Happy Days? So did I.. blah blah potsie ralph fonz richie jonie howard blah blah..."
but i'm a little over it now. I'm still bummed I don't have teeshirts and things to say "HAh! See! I like a thing that you probably don't know about or, if you're old enough, you might remember!" but I'll get over it.

new subject? I think so.
So I'm really getting sick of the "You are a lazy butt, get a job." speech. The "You're staring adulthood right in the face" is getting tiring. And i'm sick of it.
I'll do it on my own time! Don't go scoffing. please. I don't appreciate it. It would be a different story if it was the other way around, wouldn't it. So stop.

I got called as a Seminary Class Prez. I was super honored, especially considering my terrible seminary background... My parents were excited. I was excited. But I'm beginning to think, however, that everyone else who is called to this position is feeling nothing. I guess the excitement will wear off and get tiring... but whatever. I'll keep doing what I'm doing and not go over the top with this so i don't scare people off or give them the wrong impression of me.

I'm starting to be more and more excited for college. Now that i've got an apartment waiting for me and a school picked out and i'm on my way to graduation. It scares me a whole lot less.
plus, looking at myself, I find that i'm super responsible. I can cook for myself, i wash my own laundry, i keep my room clean regularly, I know how to wash dishes without gagging, i'm pretty good at saving money and spending it wisely. So i'll be fine in college. It's just the loneliness that's gonna get me, i think. But i'm getting better at being on my own. I am much less anti-social, even though i'm not much for initiating hang-outs or parties. those flop too often... I just had to get over the frustration with myself that i thought i can't do anything, i'm too young. Now i'm too old and i'm not prepared and blah blah. whatever.

does anyone else think this blog is too long?
Natural Log (= ln)

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Oldies but Goodies

actually, great-ies. if that's a thing. which it should be.


I re-love the beatles. A lot a lot. I've been listening to them morning and night and whenever i can between. What a great band! And I can't think of even one song that I hate that they did. not even one. Which is impressive. I haven't listened to all of their music... i'm still in the adolescent stages of my love... but i'm a whole lot older in terms of loving them. if that made any sense...

Don't worry, I still love Duran Duran and Depeche Mode, Connells, The Cure, The Smith's, Morrissey, Midnight Oil... and so on, I'm just expanding my musically historical horizons in positive directions.

And. I came up with my order of liking them. The first two and the last two change but the two parties of two don't mingle. It goes (as of late)





Just because. Oh, and I like them for their messages. like "peace" "love" etc. Who could go wrong there? hardly possible.

On another note.

I'm no good at drawing, but i'm learning.

I am pretty good at jewelry-ing and i'm getting better.

Second semester (and last, whoa) is going swell and, aside from some self-doubt issues, it shall continues rising.

Until graduation. where it will peak for like 3 or 4 hours, a party will happen, then i'll go on a totes rad vaca to somewhere. and then I'll move out and do things like go to college. Go Werewolves? I think? Oh, right. Wolverines. That took me a minute... btw.

"Before we go, let's remember all the fun we had today!" (Yo Gabba Gabba).
The Beatles - possibly the most legendary band ever to hit mother earth in the face with brilliant music.
Woverines - the college i plan on attending. well... the mascot.
heartslash Ellaphella